Coffee House Spaz
by kimchi121
Summary: One trip to the coffee shop gone horribly….Spazzy? A few nations along with a couple of cities have taken a break from a meeting. After drinking the coffee there, several if not all the nations/cities have changed. What chaos will ensue? Read to find out the crazy stuff that happens in this coffee shop visit gone ical? Rated T for Chicago's swears and other stuff R
1. Just a Regular Meeting

A/N: Based on an RP…..with my awesome friends on the Forum. PaintingMornings, Spliced-Kitten, oXBlackCatXo, and Me. It's pretty Random….so I don't really know exactly who was rping who…I'm sorry if it's random. I tried my best.

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It was just a regular day for the nations, and some cities. A meeting was currently taking place, but wasn't going anywhere as usual. Greenland was acting nervous as the other nations were doing their usual banter. It was her first time being there so it was a new experience for her along with Valentina. Also known as Milan. The nations were currently arguing about some nonsense like they usually do.

"Valentina! Damn it! Where the heck is my wallet?" Romano yelled at his cousin. She was lucky that a few larger nations were in front of both her and Greenland. Greenland had jumped back at the sound of Romano's voice and hid behind Italy. The ditzy Italian just laughed as he watched her hide behind him. He stopped when he saw his brother and cousin face to face. Valentina was laughing as her fuming cousin appeared before her, his face red as his hands were clenched into fists. But his curl just made him look adorable.

"Aww, Lovino, you just look so adorable when you're mad." Valentina cooed. Greenland peeked out from behind Italy.

"I…..Is he….you know….going to hurt her….?" She asked Italy worried about her new friend.

"Ve! Of course not! Fratello just gets angry and she ends up embarrassing him. Then it's all over." He said happily. Romano glared at Valentina.

"Shut up! Where's my money?" he asked his smiling cousin.

"If you can guess what I'm thinking of I'll give it back." She stated. Romano let out an exasperated sigh. Greenland was relieved, but still kept an eye on them just incase.

"Pasta!?"

"Nope."

"Cats?"

"Nope!"

"Oh my g-...Just give me my damn wallet!" he yelled, tired of guessing.

"Nein!" She squeaked, running into the large group of countries, which just so happened to be right next to them. Italy just giggled as Romano raced after her.

Suddenly, Arctic stumbled into the room mumbling to herself as papers were flying in every direction. She watched the current commotion unfold.

"Geez, of course." she rolled her eyes. "Can't we ever get through a meeting without anyone trying to kill someone or each other?...Immature idiots…." she mumbled to herself. Gathering her papers she found a random chair and plopped down in it. She then planted her face on the desk, with a considerably loud THUNK. Just then, the faint stomping of feet was heard. Getting louder and louder as they neared the doors of the meeting room.

"WHERE THE HELL IS FRANCE!?" England exclaimed, while bursting into the conference room fuming. He looked down right pissed off.

"Francey-pants hide me!" Valentina exclaimed, hiding behind the Frenchman.

"Oh so you came back to me, no?" France said as he looked down at her. A smirk crossing his lips. She just narrowed her eyes at him and kicked his shins, just as Romano appeared.

"There you are France!" England exclaimed. "What the Bloody Hell is wrong with you?" the Englishman stated. Suddenly a certain albino man came into the conference room.

"Kesesesesesese! The meeting isn't a meeting without the all awesome Prussia!" he bellowed. Germany just shook his head and dragged Prussia off to sit next to him.

France's pained expression immediately left his face as he saw England. He grinned as he walked up and wrapped an arm around him.

"Ello." He said smoothly. Valentina and Romano arguing behind him. Valentina still hadn't given back Romano's wallet, as it was currently hidden behind her back.

"Get your bloody hands off of me you frog." England stated while scowling.

"Aww, didn't you miss me?" he replied pulling the Brit closer. "Why are you so upset?" He whispered into England's ear. England just blushed like crazy.

"No...no I did not miss you one bit. And I'm not upset….nope not at all."

"Oh, but I missed you." France cooed, playing with England's hair. "You seemed upset, when you walked in. Did I do something wrong?"

"Yes...actually you did do something wrong. You told me that you posted a picture of me in a dress...How the bloody hell did you even get that picture?" He whisper screamed.

"You looked so cute in a dress!" he said happily. "But I have my ways." France then proceeded to pull out his phone, showing England the picture. And he was indeed in a dress. "I sent it to everyone so they can see." France said and with just one click of a button he sent the picture to everyone of the nations, be it city or state. Meanwhile Romano, fed up with arguing, picked up Valentina and brought her back to the others. She just let out a long string of curses as he did so.

After a brief pause of silence, England snapped.

"You What!?" England stated gritting his teeth. Suddenly there was laughter in the distance.

"Kesesese! Oh mein gott! I didn't know eyebrows could pull of a dress! Kesesesesese!" He laughed, tears forming at the corner of his crimson eyes. After seeing the picture, Arctic made her way other to France. She then proceeded to kick him hard in the vital regions.

"I don't appreciate your perverted ways finding their way to my phone, you idiot." she told France as he was was currently crumpled on the floor holding his vital regions. England thanked her in return.

"Thank you. God, I was so close to kicking him in the vital regions myself." He said, glad that someone did it for him. Arctic smirked in return.

"You welcome…." she paused for a moment then continued. "Why on Earth were you in a dress, anyways?" she asked, an eyebrow raised in suspicion.

"Oh quite simple really. I was drunk off my arse and lost a bet….I didn't even know someone took a picture of me….all I remembered was when I woke up, I was in a British maid's uniform." (The outfit of fem England) he replied.

"O-of course…" Arctic said, her eye twitched as she resisted the urge to face palm.

France was still curled on the ground, an odd expression on his face. Valentina was giggling at the picture on her phone. Romano wasn't pleased. He appeared next to France a dark look on his face. He then started kicking the Frenchie.

"What the hell are you sending my cousin!?"

Russia looked at his phone and glanced at England, his eyes a little wide. 'Huh….Comrade England is strange….oh well everyone has kinks da?' he thought to himself.

"England, dude! What were you doing dressed like a girl?" America laughed, looking at the picture on his phone.

"For the last time I was drunk and….you know what? Forget about it." England said. Arctic just rolled her eyes.

"The immaturity of these people nowadays...geez."

America was still laughing as he walked off, a few countries glaring at the American because of his loudness.

"Aiya! America is so loud aru! I think I need new eardrum." China complained.

"Ja he's so loud. I wonder where he get's it from." Germany said while eyeing Prussia.

"Don't look at me West. It was that one time! I had to train his army, I mean the kid used his bayonet as a tool to roast marshmallows!" Prussia replied.

"Ja, ja." Germany said.

"Wanker…." England mumbled.

"Dear Lord, America, do you know the meaning of the phrase shut up!?" Arctic screamed.

"Haha, nope!" America yelled, stuffing his face with a Hershey's bar.

England then turned back to France. "are you getting up or what frog?"

"O-oui." he mumbled, standing up and brushing his shirt off. France smiled at America and Arctic, while slightly glaring at the latter. Arctic returned his glare.

"It's not my fault you decided to blackmail Iggy," she muttered.

"I wasn't blackmailing! I was just showing the others how cute he looked in a dress." He said with a shrug of his shoulders. France patted England's back. "He didn't even fight when I got him into the dress." He said, winking suggestively.

"SO IT WAS YOU!" England said pointing an accusing finger at France.

"Stop being such a perv, France!" she yelled, as she cringed along with clutching her ears.

"I'm only saying the truth, mon cher." He smirked, casually tossing an arm over both Arctic and England's shoulders.

"Pft….Oh that's alright. I have a good load of black mail on this wanker." England said grinning like the Cheshire cat while motioning towards the Frenchie. Arctic just scowled and pushed France away.

"Don't. You. Dare. Touch. ME." she growled threateningly. France acted hurt, putting a hand to his chest.

"But I thought we were good friends." France said dramatically.

"When were we ever good friends!?" My GOD, France, don't you remember what I did to you just a few minutes ago!?" Arctic yelled. France just wiped an invisible tear, hugging England.

"At least I still have you, mon cher." France said, a perverted smile forming on his face. England visibly twitched in return.

"France…..the hell do you think you're doing?" England grumbled. France rubbed his cheek against England's. "Admit it, you missed me." Arctic just threw her hands in the air in exasperation.

"That's it! I've seen enough! Goodbye, and good freaking day!" With that said she stormed off, but not before stomping on France's foot as hard as she could. In return he squeaked like a little girl, jumping away from England and holding his foot.

"Sheesh….you people don't get enough love."

Meanwhile, America was having a nice conversation with Valentina. That is until….

"Wait….Dude, you mean you've never eaten Arby's? They don't have that where you live!?" America gasped, looking at her. She just shook her head. "Man! You haven't lived till you've eaten Arby's!" He yelled flabbergasted.

Ignoring America's banters England sighed.

"Well are you coming for coffee or what?" he asked France. He straightened up and nodded, a grin on his face.

"Oui." England just rolled his eyes and went to a nearby coffee shop with France.


	2. Coffee

"So what are you going to have frog?"

"Whatever you have," he said, while gently touching the petals of the rose in his hand. He then held it out for England and smirked.

"Um...okay then…." England said, taking the rose while blushing. France smiled and looked towards the counter, where a woman was staring at them with an unamused expression. He ordered what he thought England would like and spun around with two cups in his hand, steam rising from the lids.

"Thank you…" England said taking the cup and taking a sip. It was surprisingly good and England couldn't help but sigh.

"I thought you would like it," he said, taking a sip of his own drink. France sat down at a small table and leaned back. Crossing one leg over the other, he patted the seat next to him and smiled. England looked around for any other seat available but all the seats were taken, except for the one beside France. Giving up he sat down with him. France laughed as he tapped his fingers on the pale brown cup in his hand.

"I won't bite."

"Oh really?" England eyed the Frenchman suspiciously drinking his coffee. France just rolled his eyes, taking a long sip of the warm drink in his hands. he set it down and looked at England. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Just making sure you don't try something…" England said. It was warm and sunny without a cloud of rain in sight. England just smiled and thought about the weather.

"I wouldn't do anything ig you didn't like it." He replied, dabbing his lips with a white paper napkin. France then stretched his arms and put one over England's shoulder, a tiny smirk appearing on his face. He looked out the large window that was placed beside them. England just shrugged and went back to drinking his coffee. Suddenly a wild Chicago appears!

"Sup guys whatcha doin'?" he asked while tilting his head to the side. France looked at Chicago and smiled.

"Bonjour." He said, playing with the empty cup with his free hand.

"Nothing just having a coffee or had it." England said while playing with the cup. Arctic appeared next to Chicago.

"Hello everybody!" she said, grinning madly as her eye was twitching. France just looked at the two. He was slightly annoyed that they showed up, but happy nonetheless. He glanced at Arctic with an odd expression.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yup! I feel great! Amazing! Perfect! Swimmingly awesome! Isn't life the best!? It's so beautiful!" she said excitedly.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T SELL BEER HERE!?" came the voice of an angry Prussian.

"I'm sorry sir but we don't sell beer here. How about a nice coffee instead?" After a moment Prussia smiled and ordered a nice large cup of coffee black.

"Danke!" he replied. The girl who took his order just had a blank expression on her face as well as England and Chicago.

"I swear he confuses me more and more…" England said. Arctic followed their gazes.

"Why is his hair all funny looking? It's white! Isn't that weird?" she laughed and tugged at her own white hair. Prussia spotted the others and came over, coffee in hand.

"Sup losers!? The awesome me has arrived." he announced.

"Bonjour Gilbert. How are you?" France said.

"Just doing awesome. I just lost West….wonder where he could be…." He trailed off as he took a sip of his coffee. "This coffee tastes awesome." He stated.

"Ja it must me hmm bruder?" Germany said from behind him an eyebrow raised.

"Hey West just here to grab a coffee. You should really try some it's amazing." Prussia said. Germany seeing as how most of the nations had coffee. He thought it was no big deal and bought himself a cup.

"Do they have pasta?" Valentina asked, popping up behind Chicago and Arctic. France stared at Arctic and pulled his arm away from England. He blew a kiss towards them as he walked towards the counter.

"Hmm...I wonder what he's doing." Germany said, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Ooh! Kissy face!" Arctic giggled. Valentina slowly backed away from Arctic, a fake smile adorning her face.

"Are you okay?" she asked. Arctic blinked tilting her head to the side.

"Why is everybody asking me that question? I'm PERFECTLY fine! ESPECIALLY after that coffee! Isn't coffee GREAT!? It makes me feel all, like, spazzy and all funny inside…" Arctic replied a dazed look in her eyes. Valentina looked at the coffee in France's hands when he returned and shuddered. Valentina decided not to get a cup since she didn't want to go on a high like Arctic.

Arctic looked at France, smiling, "Can I have that coffee of yours, France? I want more." Suddenly the coffee was starting to kick in. Arthur got this wild look in his eyes as he was sneering.

"Heh Francis wha are we gonna do?" He said talking in an accent that sounded a lot like Scotland's. "If ya got naw idea then get me some more o' that coffee," he said.

"NO! I want coffee!" Arctic said as she scowled at England. France just stared at the two and handed them the two cups that were in his hands. Arctic grinned and snatched the cup from France's hand. Before anyone could say anything, Arctic pressed the cup to her lips, ignoring the heat, and chugged it all down in two huge gulps. She trembled in delight as the coffee sent shivers down her spine.

"That's wha I'm talkin' about!" England said and downed his cup as well. "Bloody hell I haven't felt like this since the 70's...I'll be right back!" he stated and left. Chicago just sat with his cup. He'd gotten in the middle of the commotion, between the others. He was drinking his coffee as well. Unaware of the effects it'd have on him as well. Arctic watched England leave, then turned to Chicago, casually throwing an arm around his shoulder.

"Chicago! My man! How's life?" she asked.

"Life….life sucks...everything is full of bleak and dark colors...full of stress and the constant expectations directed upon oneself by others….but you just can't handle the stress...then soon you just inflict pain on yourself because no one can really understand you...then soon you go on a path of self destruction and horrible shit happens…" Chicago sated morbidly. England on the other hand arrived minutes later with black sunglasses, black skinny jeans, red converse, a black and red checkered bandana around his neck, a black t-shirt that said 'ANARCHY in the UK!' in red and a black leather jacket.

"How are ye all doin'?" France's eyebrows shot up when he saw England "Wha…"

"Oh mein gott Eyebrows? What in Gott's name happened to you? You actually look awesome." Germany said.

"Ja he does." Prussia said nonchalantly, a serious expression on his face. Valentina was trembling in a corner, scared of the others. Coffee is a terrible drink.

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A/N: Mwahahahahahah Let the chaos ensue! REVIEW!


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